Now Internet talking about real incident of conference woman in elevator. The time is 4am and mans alone with her in the elevator. Man asking woman going back to room for coffee. She later telling conference the man behaving is not correct appropriate one. Many the mans not being upset saying is only the situation innocent. What now does your friend the OneMalePerspective saying?
I do much reading and thinking about the issue of this. Many from the mans and the womans. Much the intellectual discussion, the rape victims, the rapists, the feminist, the mans rights and the false rape accused. I am for men's liberation.
If you are the false rape accusation victim then already is the situations not the relevant one for you because never being alone with stranger womens. Even the elevator having the camera you not knowing if working or corruption making go away recording. If you false rape accusation survivor or know the mans who is then I am understand your behaviour. Just like the woman's treating every the man as Schrodinger's Rapist, same the mans (from their own personal assessment) can be treating womans as the Schrodinger's False Rape Accuser.
But this is not my OneMalePerspective. Here I am now saying.
The man is wrong. The womans is correctly making publicly situation because we can learn much education. Maybe mans name is not so important and neither the womans. This is reason why even situation is real I am choose not to repeat names. This one the interpersonal incident is education for all.
Why is man wrong in situation? Everybody the human being (even the animals) have the boundaries personal that we expecting the other beings respect. Our boundaries personal are situational. I am now giving ok good the customer person calling me at 2pm. Not usual acceptable for customer calling me at the 2am.
- ok good the secretary reading my emails helping me the business. Not acceptable person I am just meeting sneaky reading my emails.
- ok good you asking me for money dressing in charity uniform with the identifications showing while on the busy places. Not acceptable group of menacing people with weapons asking the money (unless the tax man haha).
This not a gender issue is basic human issue. If making the good relationship with the human other then must respecting they having boundaries personal. If wanting this humans respecting you the boundaries personal then must giving also respect. Some these the boundaries are encoded into the culture so should be reason to expect this the boundary is default until person the other human communication that boundary difference. For own personal protection reason setting boundary at safety distance.
Just as in previous the article I am wanting bar girl leaving me alone - she is not the wrong behaviour for approaching in bar. Is ok culture encoding boundary to expect that person in bar can be approach (whatever the motivation of girl having). Problem is after I am communicating that my boundary difference as culture expectation she then must leaving me alone.
So man in elevator is wrong. He must understanding that woman want culture encoding this the situation not for approach of coffee offering. Woman now communication this boundary clearly so no the excuses. The further issue is woman saying communication they constantly calculation the Schrodinger's Rapist so if mans is dealing with woman he must aware of safety situational boundary.
The respect of the personal boundaries is the mutual contract of social civilization for the humans. I want others (womans too) respecting my boundaries so I am returning the respect.
Gender non-specific red-flag: If other the person not respecting your boundaries then this the red flag. Even the relationship being friendship, professional, stranger, romantic not respecting boundary is Red-Flag.
No comments:
Post a Comment